This is way late for a”how my 2015 went” post. That’s not what this is. This post has been cooking in my head for a while now, and it’s finally coming together more cohesively.
In many ways, my 2015 was a year of changes and challenges. I turned 30. I moved out of my parents’ house and got a place on my own. I said goodbye to people that were dear to my heart. And, I started a blog. Life definitely threw some curveballs at me amidst all of it but also created room, much room, for growth and development.
Turning 30 leaves a lot of people anxious, lost, and directionless. I had been preparing myself to embrace these feelings and anxieties that people have told me about. The weird thing is, it didn’t happen for me. Being 30 feels mostly the same, minus the aging jokes I get to crack now. A part of me is even excited about this new decade that I get to start out anew, equipped with so much self awareness and mental clarity, at least compared to when I started my 20’s. It’s a big change that came in with such positive energy it almost surprised me.
Moving out to live on my own is something that is long overdue according to societal standards. For me, this arrangement made a lot of sense previously because of financial/short commute reasons, and also because I am incredibly close with my parents. And even given all of these reasons, sometimes you just know it’s the time to do move on. You go through with the the motion, and it feels just right. Moving out was one of those things.
Starting a blog was something that I have always wanted to do, but never got around doing. My blog was born out of my desire to create something for myself, and being able to have something I can call my own; tending to the builder within me, so to speak. It serendipitously also allows me to put a lot of things I practice at work, which is marketing communications, into my approach to blogging. It’s a lot of fun and very rewarding; the best part it is that the reward comes in so many different ways. I recently teamed up with a group of amazing workwear/office fashion bloggers for a loop giveaway on Instagram and it was quite a success. Let me know if you’d like to hear more about that!
All of these things, and others, created a lot of space for me to think about who I am as a person, and who I really want to be. I’m not going to lie, every single one of the things I mentioned above has given me plenty to freak out about. But I ended up handling them, and in the process of handling them, no matter how clumsy I was, I gained confidence and faith in the end that I CAN handle them.
I read this article on Career Contessa earlier this month. It talks about the difference between motivation and purpose in that most people look for ways to get “motivated” when they feel down or dejected. What they don’t realize is that motivation is transient in nature, it’s a “pick me up” that zaps us with temporary energy so we can keep going. It’s the byproduct of something else, something bigger, that can be constantly motivating. That something else, something bigger, is purpose.
I think that is what 2016 is going to be for me – adhering to my purpose, and in some aspect of my life, finding my purpose. I spent my entire 20’s looking for self confidence, evidence and reasons to believe in myself. I know that’s no longer a something I search for, because I have it now. And in the next decade in my life, I am going to focus on loving and caring for my own well being, and being responsible for my own development and growth.